Primal Flash - Lingering Sadness

Primal Flash - Lingering Sadness

A lot of people don’t know this about me they know i say 2016 was hell but never know why, it’s been difficult to overcome but here i am with a sense of peace but a lingering sadness.

it was the beginning of 2016 when my dad passed away, if you ever wonder why i hate headaches so much it’s not about the pain, yeah that sucks and i can’t work for shit if i have a migraine, it’s more because my father who rarley seldom had headaches he kept saying but never to me within a week of his passing that he had a headache, he told me on my first day working in the same facility as him, the last day i saw his smile. He passed on the 23rd of January the headache was caused due to a blood clot near the stem of his brain which led to an aneurysm. From his passing for at least the next 8 or so months i was lost, so lost my life was falling apart. My grandfather passed in February but for me to him it felt more of a blessing to have lived his life and in the end i believe he was reunited with his memories. i like to believe him and dad are somewhere up there in the bowling alley in the sky havin a good time. Anyways it was in the months after that life felt the worst, i haven’t much to say about these days but i lost 3 or 4 jobs in that time, got cheated on, and kicked out of the place i was staying. After that i couldn’t find a place to live or a job that’d sustain me for a place to live. i moved to Arizona July 2nd 2016 to be with my mom who moved out here when all of the chaos started and to be nearer to my awesome nephews, sister and bro in law. it was at least 2 to 3 weeks after the move when a temp agency told me “hey you wanna work in a vape warehouse?” i said sure, had no idea what to expect. The truth is i was alone, the new kid on the block. i mean luckily for me mbv picked me on officially within a month of my temping. Yet still i was alone but a couple months passed and i made my first friend here a creep by the name  Luke, i thought he was weird when i first started at mbv but then he switched to my department and we were like “Hey, let’s go skate!” we did, i’m glad we did. This guy is  like a brother to me. it wasn’t long after that work soon became a family sort of away from family if you will. My mbv homies are all now really  important to me. i wouldn’t trade them for anything. if only i could get a girlfriend. lol

Still back to the beginning of my story even with all these newfound friends everynight i find myself looking up asking “Am i making you proud?” and then in the morning i always want to run down stairs to chat with dad about comics and superhero things, then i have to come to  the reality that i currently live in a small single floor home and he’s not there, not in that way and on top of all this sadness i’m alive, i’m living so that one day in the far far off future i can join him and say “i made it  dad” and tell him  about my friends and maybe a wife  and kids if i’m lucky. This is  my story and i really want to say thanks to all who are a part of it. And to my illinois friends i miss you guys and i promise i’ll visit soon. i love you all, thank you!

Ray Reinhart~